For as long as I can remember I have always had a different sense of style & a different personality than the people around me. I have never been interested in dressing or doing my hair the same way as everyone else. I can still remember in kindergarten when I would make my mom put my hair in tiny little buns all over my head because I knew no one else would have it! Anytime I have ever tried to dress similar to my peers I have always felt uncomfortable or boring. I am not saying that what's in style right now is boring, I am just stating that for some odd reason it makes me feel boring.
On a more serious note being different has gotten me into some pretty depressing situations which really it shouldn't. I always thought being different was a great thing & I still think it is, but what are you suppose to do when you are 17 years old & your best friend at the time says she feels intimidated by your style. I have always been attracted to people who are different than your average joes & to hear the one person that I thought enjoyed being around people like that too, tell me that I made her feel that way really hurt me. Now, I know that's not the only reason I lost her as a friend, but the fact that it was a factor to it made me feel really insecure.
Once I went to a job interview at a salon in the city & one of the main reasons I started hair styling was because it was an outlet to be creative & show expression through hair & style. I had never once thought the way I did my hair in the 1950s flare or the way I had tattoos would hold me back while getting a job to be a stylist. If I am being entirely honest, I thought it would only benefit me. As I was at the interview the employer asked me if this was the way I always dressed. I replied that I enjoy many styles & I pull a lot of my inspiration from the 50s & the 60s. She then went on to tell me that my style might make clients feel uncomfortable which I thought sounded pretty strange because when I get my hair done I always love to go to someone who's creative. It's like my whole 17 year old self standing in that hallway was floating back & suddenly I felt insecure & awkward. I never did call that lady back & nor will I ever give someone the time of day if they focus more about how I dress & less about my talents & personality. Can I just say that I am not saying that all salons are this way...because they are not. I am just using this salon as a example.Unlike that day when a friend let me down, I got into my car & I didn't let it ruin me, instead I thought to myself, "well that person is missing out on a chance to work with me."
Excuse me while I go all over the place here, but has anyone been in a relationship where they dress or act a certain way to fit their significant others style? STOP. If you have to change to fit someone else you shouldn't be with them in the first place. If you wanna shave all your hair off, dye your hair an insane color, or get a tattoo on your face or whatever, your lover should love you anyways. They don't have to particularly enjoy the way you style yourself, but they should accept it & the way you look shouldn't be the main reason why they love you anyway. I cannot stand when woman would come into the salon & say, "I can't dye my hair this color because my husband wouldn't like it." I can't help but say, "It's not your husbands hair is it?" Be who you want to be & dress how you want to dress because life is way to short to worry about details like that. You should be worrying about building healthy relationships, gaining confidence that radiates in a room, loving who you are in the inside, etc.
I guess what I am really trying to say is don't be afraid to be yourself. If people in your life make fun of you for wearing something different, than maybe you need to rethink their position in your life. Also, don't change yourself to fit for someone. This isn't just in regards to a particular style but don't change your views for someone you are trying to impressive. Lastly, if you see someone on the street who might be wearing something that you particularly wouldn't wear, do not judge them on it. We are given the freedom to be what we want to be, and if you feel the need to make fun of people for trying to figure themselves out creatively than you need some serious thinking time. Moral of this whole word vomit is love yourself & allow others to love themselves even if it might not be the way you agree.
xo,
Mady
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